Mardi Gras & My Birthday…
Feb 25th, 2007 by Tony
Mardi Gras… Lent, hurricanes, Easter, parades, New Orleans, beads, Rio de Janeiro… girls gone wild? Mardi Gras means something different to everyone.
For me, with the arrival of Mardi Gras I realize I’m one year further removed from the time when I should have participated in the festivities. I should have done it when I was in college; back when things like getting stabbed, robbed and harvested for my organs were less on the forefront of my conscience.
But that’s one of the things that comes with age; the ability to see the potential dangers we were too careless to worry about in our youth.
But is that necessarily a good thing?
I can’t think of anyone recalling experiences from their 30s or 40s with the same reverence they recall stories from their 20s. I mean really, think of your top 5 most memorable, wackiest, funniest, laugh out loud, “I can’t believe we DID that!” moments from your life, and I’d be willing to bet that 99% of them came from your college years. Even if you didn’t go to college, you know I’m talking about the quasi-decade between 18-25.
No longer under the tyrannical thumbs of our parents, we were free to make some of the worst decisions of our lives (and boy, did we). But we also happened into making some of the most inspired. So why do we feel as we get older we have to pull in the proverbial reigns and “grow up”? What’s fun about being grown up? Bills, work, responsibilities. Blah.
Fate made sure to drive the point home this year, as Fat Tuesday was home to another momentous day: my 30th birthday.
*pause for applause*
I have a good buddy who himself turns 30 in April. When I talked to him recently, I got the distinct impression that he wasn’t looking forward to his big day. Which got me to thinking… was I dreading turning 30 and just hadn’t given myself the chance to think about it? I didn’t think so, yet unbeknownst to me (but knownst to others)* I was about to find out.
I was so oblivious to my fast approaching big day that my wife & sister managed to arrange an elaborate, inter-state surprise birthday party for me right under my nose. Obviously I was thrilled to have such an outpouring of support from my friends and family, but ultimately the event stirred emotions completely different than anyone could have expected.
I realized just how happy I am with everything going on in my life right now.
I don’t know if I can accurately summarize just how or when it occurred to me. It’s not like I was unhappy before that day… I guess I just never stopped to think about it. I think at times I felt like Steve Martin in Parenthood when his wife asked if he had to go right now.
“My whole life is have to”.
To an extent, that will always be true. But really, it always has been. Just because I didn’t have the responsibility of today in years past, doesn’t mean that I didn’t still have things I HAD to do. I certainly wouldn’t be where I am today if I only did what I wanted to do and nothing else. But I’m starting to get off track here…
For a time as Mardi Gras rolled around, I was bummed that I never made it to the Big Easy for its signature event. Just one of those coulda woulda shoulda things that seemed like it would have been a memorable weekend with my college amigos.
But thanks to the unexpected result of my 30th birthday party… I find myself less concerned with things I should have done, and much more focused on things yet to come. What’s fun about being “grown up”? I’m thinking first words, first steps… and those should come in just the next few months. I’ve got years and years of firsts, wonderfuls, & amazings… not to mention memorable, wacky, funny, laugh out loud, “I can’t believe she did that!” moments from her life. Her life… that’s not even 8 months old yet…
Maybe I won’t tell any stories about my 30s and 40s like I’ll tell of my 20s. My wild and crazy days may be behind me, yet I’m convinced my best days are still ahead of me; even if my favorite memories to come will cast me only in a supporting role. Thanks entirely to that stinkerbell rolling around on the floor right now with her momma (and potentially another bundle within a couple of years.)
So I’m done feeling bummed about things that never happened (even if I wasn’t that bummed to begin with). After my party, when I put my little girl to bed, I whispered into her ear “Thank you for making my thirtieth birthday my bestest birthday.”
Where would I be without her?
Td
*bonus points for those of you who spotted my movie quote!
and now, a word from our sponsor! (Jen)
A big CONGRATULATIONS to SuznK, who wrote:
Love your work. It inspires me!
As to the Sunday morning title…what about “i {heart} the stamper”? Absolutely great blog and I enjoyed Tony’s take on being married to a stamper!Suz
Please email with your full name and address and be watching your mailbox for a little “tart” to be coming your way. 
Aw…so sweet…you sound like my DH. He had much the same pseudo-regrets (since he spent his 20s getting three degrees in University) and then right into the “big world” as a newly minted engineer and husband. Now with two kids, a mortgage and a constant whirlwind of mania, spilled milk and dinky cars, he wouldn’t have it any other way!
This post brought tears to my eyes. I remember when I reached the point of realizing that I love my life, just like it is. Coming to that realization set me free. FREEDOM! NO REGRETS! It is a fabulous place to be.
Happy belated birthday, Tony! ….and many, many more….!
Suz
Oh….and after grabbing the tissue because this post was very touching…I read on to find out that my idea for Tony’s Sunday blog was chosen! Whooo hoooo! Thanks, and I’m glad you liked the idea!
Aww, what a sweet post! I turn 30 in just over 1 year. I am not sure how I feel about that quite yet! Luckily, my stamping sister already gave me a lovely “old & moldy” card for my 27th birthday, lol!
That was an amazing post. It made me teary-eyed. I love sentiment especially from the opposite sex. What a great tribute to your daughter. My thirties were the best ever. Financially, physicallly, and emotionally. I had many adventures and you will too. Take care and thanks for sharing.
Dawn
What a great post! I would have to agree with Dawn in that the 30 something years were great! The best is yet to come and it sounds like you are well on your way to knowing that already! To appreciate the little things and move forward without regret is so much better than dwelling on the shoulda, coulda, woulda beens! I can say this ’cause I’ve “been there, done that”! Thanks for sharing!
Love what you said about the best years are ahead of you… girl, you are right on! I missed the fun, wacky, crazy times of my 20’s/college days, until I had my kiddos. Now, I am having the TIME OF MY LIFE. They keep me full of wonder about life, about what fun REALLY is… oh my gosh, and it just keeps getting better & better. My oldest is 5 1/2 and my youngest is 2 1/2, with an almost 4 yr. old stuck in between. They are too much fun… I’m going to miss them when they are in school all day…
Happy Birthday, enjoy the next 30 years, celebrate LIFE!
happy birthday–what wonderful realizations! babies have a way of putting our lives into wonderful perspective, don’t they? my oldest was 5 months old on my 30th. but (and my main reason for writing)…
mardi gras is not just for 20-somethings! i’ll be 38 this year and we’ve never missed one. my college ones were shortened since tx doesn’t have mardi gras break, and of course those quickie weekends have lots of stories! but, here’s a snippet of how they go now…
http://confetti.typepad.com/confetti/2007/02/puppy_love.html
of course, we live here and one day we’ll have to take advantage of the week off from school to take a fun vacation, but we’d never miss all of it. so don’t take it off your list just yet!
Well Jen, you have got yourself “a keeper”. Tony inspirational post. Beautiful picture of you and the little one. Post should have come with a warning, “get tissue before you read”. Hugs to you all. Karen
What a wonderful post, Tony!!! Your story touched all of us. Even though I’ve got 30+ years on you, I still remember all the firsts that my children have brought to my life. They still amaze me with their seconds, thirds, and million-ths!! Now I get to enjoy the grandkids’ firsts, seconds, and million-ths. Keep doing what you’re doing and posting all those milestones. You have enriched my day!
Linda